Ordering people to get out of victimhood, to suck it up, that they created their own reality, that others have it worse, to snap out of it, to get over it, to let it go, to move on already, to not be dramatic, to cheer up, that they are lazy or life isn't supposed to... Continue Reading →
When we carry unresolved trauma (and we all have been traumatized to some degree or another), our past rules our thoughts, our dreams, our behaviors, our addictions, our choices, our beLIEfs, and our health. One thing that brings us all together is that we are living in the past while not being conscious of it.... Continue Reading →
"Armchair psychologist" is a derogatory term used to shame and silence those who have insight, personal experience or opinions on the human condition (without mainstream accreditation) that makes someone else feel uncomfortable. You can only opine on trauma, it's impact and the ways to heal only if you have mainstream accreditation. This makes no logical... Continue Reading →
...and how to help people when they are down...... People can appear to be "stuck in victimhood". To resolve this, ask yourself why this happens. When you feel you have the answer, but are still silently condemning or are still irritated or feel the need to lecture, then you might not know the real reason... Continue Reading →
This question was asked to the writers of "The Courage to Heal". So, I am taking it upon myself to answer this as well since this must be a common inquiry for people like myself. My answer is that it is not depressing for me at all! I got through enough of my healing that... Continue Reading →
When we are being raped, someone is literally imposing their will on us. We realize at that point we are powerless and there is no escape. Rape is a power-grab. Unhealed childhood sexual abuse can cause us to feel like others are forcing their opinions down our throat even when that is not happening. When... Continue Reading →
The part of the brain responsible for intuition, discernment, and critical thinking can get compromised when we have been traumatized as children. This is why some of us might get re-exposed to the same trauma as adults. Childhood trauma can set the stage to more victimization in adulthood because we might put our trust in... Continue Reading →
The word "healing" in our culture has two different meanings depending on who is talking. There is one kind of healing that is false-healing which does not involve much pain. The main goal of most therapists, spiritual teachers and life-coaches (even if they have good intentions) is to get you to trick your mind into... Continue Reading →
Nobody comes out of a traumatic background unscathed unless they have fully done the difficult blood, sweat and tears work of recovery. Some of us (like myself) are really skilled at putting on a mask and blocking out pain so convincingly that people think we are not suffering! Those who are extroverts, laugh a lot,... Continue Reading →
Concerning the inquiry of why people sexually abuse others, there have been many people who have dug deeply and have shared their views. Generously, Adrian Millane of Australia, opined on this topic today and gave me the permission to share it. I think this is important to read because if we don't get to the... Continue Reading →
Off the Beaten Path 
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