Dealing With Keyboard Bullies

​The internet is like a shark’s tank. It’s all because people unconsciously still live in the past. They are carrying around large amounts of baggage. All that baggage and pain gets dumped on you instead. The bullies, rather than taking responsibility for their own life and feeling their feelings so they can heal from the past, act them out passively, sarcastically or sideways on innocent people who have not harmed them. Gaslighting others is also a form of passive aggression. This covert bullying behavior you see all over the internet is normalized and even applauded. We might not even realize we’re doing it because it is so normal. People are so roughened up by life and this is how they discharge their repressed shame and rage so they don’t have to feel it themselves or remember its source from the past. They might also think bullying others can prevent them from being bullied. Because if you attack someone else, you feel in control of your life and your pain is …. GONE.

What pain? I have pain? Ha. How would I know if I’m the one causing it?

I used to be bullied as a kid because I was sensitive, different,  small, fragile, and lacked the strength to beat a gang of 8th graders who towered over me. Also, when you don’t realize your own importance, you might let people pick on you. The only way for me to come out of that was to start being a bit mean myself. Then all that pain “goes away”. It’s like magic. I used to be very capable of hurting the vulnerable. This is why I can see this in others; I used to do it. It’s the ultimate pain-reliever. It was how I felt powerful — albeit false power. But I was powerful enough to forget how powerLESS I actually felt.

Now, being on the other side of it all, while I can understand what motivates bullies, it still stings to watch it going on online. I still get stung myself. The flashbacks and the worthlessness inadvertently come right back up to the surface. Then I remember how I survived it. And I see others behaving similarly. It’s a vicious sad cycle.

You can’t do anything about the sting other than to let it hurt and feel the unworthiness it might bring up. It’s old stuff that needs to be released before you can appreciate how great you really are.  Once you KNOW how great you are, sometimes you need to remind yourself  you are worthy, important, special and loved. Hold on to that to get by if you truly believe it is so. That’s the higher vibrational way of dealing with bullies. Sure it feels good to give them a spoonful of their own medicine, but at the expensive of your own energy, that is. You might die a little every time you bite back. What feels even better is realizing you don’t deserve it and that you ARE worthy.

Love yourself and be your own bestie. Nobody can ever hurt you again when you really love yourself.

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