There is a common running theme embedded in our culture and that is to do whatever in the world we can do to avoid pain at all costs:
So we preach.
And we preach…..
And preach….. and hope… that we can shut it all off.
Here are some examples of what we have been saying for millennia:
Don’t take things personally.
Move on, get over it.
The past is in the past.
Don’t question or stir the pot.
Fake it till you make it.
Forgive who wronged you.
Live in the present.
Don’t worry; be happy.
It’s just a story, an illusion.
You are breathing!
Someone else has it worse.
While some platitutes are important, others can be belittling and mean-spirited all depending on the situation and who you are talking to. Even the important platitudes have their time and place. Ask yourself if you know the person will appreciate them before advising them. Or are you using them to shut them down?
Think of all the platitudes we have been spoon-fed by our culture. Think of bible quotes and Eastern Stoic philosophy. Often we might be inadvertently trying to numb people up, shut people down and shield ourselves from the very darkness our souls need to evolve out of spiritual infancy. When we succeed in shutting off the emotions in others, we are shutting off the emotions in ourselves. We only get triggered by the pain in others because we haven’t dealt with the pain in ourselves. What we see in others is representative of the unhealed parts of ourselves.
We can’t handle our own suffering. So, we can’t handle other’s suffering. We go out of our way to shut the whole planet down. All this defeats the whole purpose of being here. We come here to plan pain and embrace pain as our catalyst to growth, so when we avoid pain, we avoid growth. However, there is a flipside. It is often necessary to shut off our own pain because we are not ready for it to unfold yet. We may have enough pain in our present lives… that pain from the past would cause us to become overwhelmed. Maybe we are here on a different mission? Maybe we are in poor health and cannot handle the effort of release? So, we sometimes probably have to avoid those in pain just to survive.
Since we are all connected and since others provide a mirror to who we are, when we avoid others, we avoid ourselves and avoid being overwhelmed.
If we are meant to face our pasts and we are trying to resist or prevent “negativity” or “negative people”, we will continue to experience them until we confront our own “negativity” or darkness that we have been resistant to face. Once we heal ourselves, we stop being affected by the darkness in others.
Being an empath might not be what we thought it was. There are other souls we have contracts with who are here for us — even strangers at the shopping mall. We absorb their emotions and pain only to learn the unhealed emotions and pain within ourselves. They are doing us a favor. They are encouraging us to heal which the soul craves to do. If we allow ourselves to absorb those third-party emotions and feel them, they disappear and we stop absorbing them all together.
The bottom line is that if you are put off by the perpetual pain of the collective soul, you have to face your own and heal. Once you do that, you will experience an entirely different world. Your response to external pain will be love next time instead of condemnation, fear and resistance.
Good luck on your journey.